The Pregnancy Diaries: Nightmares
Dream 1:
I was a horrible mother and forgot to take care of my baby. I had forgotten to feed him for like a whole day (who does that?!) and I hadn't changed his diaper at all. My mom was there and the baby was crying and she asked me if I had fed him recently which led me to suddenly realize I hadn't fed him all day!...it was like nighttime. I started crying (dreaming still) because I was such a horrible new mommy.
Although I have panic attacks sometimes when I realize I'm going to be taking care of a little baby full-time, I'm pretty sure I won't ever be that bad at mommy-ing. Let's hope not! Still, it freaked me out.
Dream 2:
I delivered and then I was so fat after delivery. I'm not talking like regular after-baby fat. I distinctly remember my belly was hanging so low that it was getting stuck between my legs. Hahaha, now that I write it I'm laughing about it but seriously...it was disgusting. I was waddling around because I couldn't get my legs close enough together to walk normally with my belly all in the way. I almost shudder just thinking about how grossly fat I was. I think this comes from reading the other day that after you deliver you will still look about 6 months pregnant so you should remember that for when you are packing your going-home-from-the-hospital clothes. I'm 6 months pregnant now and I feel HUGE. Will I seriously look this big after I deliver? I hope not but it is better than my nightmare-body.
Hopefully these kinds of dreams/nightmares don't come very often. I'm worried enough about being a new Mama! I don't need encouragement from my nightmares.
I love you, Marci, and you're beautiful. You'll always be beautiful (even if your belly falls down to your knees!). Aren't we thankful that we have a reality outside of our dreams?!
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